Last week, I took part in a workshop on Oblivion by Gustaw Dziewięcki (with dedication). While reading, I took a few pages of notes so I can start writing. First, a few words about this work in general. As I learned from the “Acknowledgments” section, the author published the book thanks to a crowdfunding website. Praise the donors for supporting debutants. One of them is the creator of this work.
Outline of the presented world
As usual in this type of books there are references to times a bit similar to the Middle Ages, so you know – horses instead of cars, daggers instead of rifles, quadruplets for servants instead of a staff hotel … Except in the Middle Ages there were no cities of several hundred thousand, orcs, elves or dwarves. We do not have much to do with the latter two races in this volume (as the cover says – the first one; how many are unknown). There are also monsters there, for example a certain tentacle devourer that can be eaten, but as it turns out – this is not the healthiest dish in the world for heroes.
In addition, we have several rulers, military and a whole host of other characters here. The most important persona is perhaps the young soldier and nobleman of Krei. You hardly ever experience women in the first half of the book, and in general there are quite a few of them in this position, of which only one is an important figure. It is clearly a male world.
The whole position is tied together like a prologue and an epilogue, which – to tell the truth – I do not understand. There is an old man and there is a child, they talk, while one persuades, the other refuses. But what’s really going on there, I don’t know. The real action begins with a rebellion from which King Mirandhir is miraculously saved. Then the plot tells about the life of the soldier Kreio and so these two stories intertwine. At some point, the adventures of the latter begin to prevail in the book.
I judge a book by its cover
At the beginning, I always judge a book by its cover, leaf through it, watch it, read a few sentences here and there, in general I try to feel the atmosphere. I will write honestly that the cover did not impress me. An eye painted with paints, and in it a red-gold depth-pupil. Besides, black and emptiness. It tells me nothing about what I find inside, what the book is about …
It’s also a pity that the description on the back cover is so enigmatic. Perhaps this was the creator’s intention not to reveal too much. However, some questions contained therein are not answered even after reading this item. Unfortunately, there is also no photo of the author – that can also tell a lot about the work. Hurriedly leafing through this volume, we come across drawings in which we can see talent, although the form is modest.
“Oblivion” – what do I like?
You can certainly find some strong points in this novel.
- The pencil drawings in the center add value to the novel (although they are a bit enigmatic and darker than the story), they make it easier to imagine the characters and enter the atmosphere of the story.
- I like the fact that each chapter has a title, and it’s fun, interesting, and unthinkable.
- The novel has its pace, which is quite lively and there is still something going on.
- Dialogues are often strong or funny, and move the action forward.
- The descriptions are also not bad, you can see that the author has quite a rich imagination and can even see what he writes about.
- Names, names are a strong point of this book, well-chosen, interesting and not played.
- You can find some nice snippets. For example, the dialogue in which the thugs talk in dialect while trying to sell a stolen coat is interesting and funny. The last, climactic scenes of the novel also caught my attention.
“Oblivion” – what I don’t like?
I believe there are a few things in Oblivion that make reading difficult.
- The biggest problem I had with this item was that the author scarcely used names. Very tight. I just often didn’t know what was going on or who was talking to whom. There are a lot of dialogues here and that’s good because they enliven the action. However, it would be worth tagging orator. To avoid repetition such as “said”, “said”, you can put the name into the conversation. It will become more readable immediately. Let us take the sentence: “Even if I do, the news will not be delivered in time,” he finally said, angering him. Who – what he says or the other interlocutor?
- I am probably a person of average intelligence. Most books are written for people like me. I understand that the author knows his heroes inside out. But we readers don’t know the story, we don’t know what’s going on. At the beginning of each book, we get to know the characters, but in this case it is a bit more difficult. I was confused. For example, I thought, “Wait a minute, he hadn’t died before?” or “Wait, she was hurt, how is she jumping and running?” I tried to read carefully, but still sometimes I had to go back a few sentences or even pages.
- There are awkwardness, for example, “[…] and a broad mocking smile was tempted on his face.” We can also come across such sentences as “The large room was meticulously filled []”. Or “Meanwhile, a companion joined him, standing on the opposite side, hand on the handle of the knife.” [
- I also don’t know why it was to introduce orcs, elves, since they are described as humans, they act like humans, they say like humans.
- The creator certainly corrected, added and changed the text endlessly. And maybe he was missing some things in the process. Example: a fleeing ruler and his subordinates come across a burned village. It turns out that she was attacked by elves, one of which was killed with his own arrow (how do you know it was his own?), Which resonates strongly in the text. Why did this happen? What are the consequences of this? What was there to write about it? It is not known. The heroes save a woman with a child who managed to survive. They take the survivors with them and … what’s next with the survivors? In books – unlike in life – certain facts should lead to others. Otherwise, it makes no sense to write about them (unless it is a biography), because readers are left with a feeling of surprise and dissatisfaction.
- Where did the title – Oblivion come from ? There is nothing in the content to justify it. Unless we find out more in the next volume.
Summary
For some time I could not go deeper into the atmosphere of this book. Maybe it was because there was no character I could really like or identify with, find my feelings or problems in him. The author should always ask himself the following questions: “What do I want to convey? What universal problem to present? What can I teach my readers? How to make them reflect? ” or finally “How can I describe in one sentence what this book is about?” Here I did not guess what it is …
I have mentioned many points which, in my opinion, hinder the reception of this book. However, my goal is not to discourage a rookie, but to inspire him to continue working. I believe that he has talent (both art and writing). He is at the beginning of his journey to becoming a recognized creator. As Stephen King wrote, you need to read more, write more and not watch TV. I would add from myself that careful editing would also be useful. As for the correction, I cannot fault anything, I did not find any mistakes.